On your question about self isolation

I wanna respect the season and in that respect ask to hold your hand and go sit at a park that has a check point.

At the checkpoint  : I wanna invite you to notice the texture of the need of self isolation. To cover the safety basis : Does it make you want to not get out of your room?  not want to eat, fear doing fundamental things: like showering or going outside for fresh air?  If you respond yes I want you to please see if you have one safe person you can confide in and I ll send you a list of therapist I know from the country you are in.

Now that safety is partly covered:

I wanna talk about seasons. And villages .

Where I live, people believe there are 4 seasons . Winter, Spring, Summer , Fall , Winter.

Where I come from there are two seasons:  Rain season and Dry season.

Where everyone is,  there is a Day and Night.  Light and Darkness.

When an emotion is dominating a season, It usually takes me time before I get aware of what’s happening . I fight it, try to fix it , try to find solutions, podcast , hot yoga , medidate my way out of it.

It doesn’t take long before I realize  I can’t just get rid of it and I have to surrender .

The minute i surrender to listen, the emotion becomes a messenger inviting me to pass by a certain village I don’t usually reside in.

In the same way that when winter comes , you get ready, heat your home , wear warm clothes , move differently, eat different food,

I ll ask the messanger(the emotion) how long it wants me to stay in its village. sometimes 3 months, other times 7 years.

(Most of the seasons have layers though. Same way in summer we get sunny days , and cold wtf days)

When I am invited to follow an emotion to a village, the more time I spend there, the  more I ll start hearing the energy beyond the message.  It’s usually a transformation & creation or on the intense case a rebirth energy.

Here what’s true and hard to believe : that I m loved supported and never alone. It’s also hard to see that something good is trying to be born.

But I ll always forever quote Michaela Coel

“In a world that entices us to browse through the lives of others to help us better determine how we feel about ourselves, and to in turn feel the need to be constantly visible — for visibility these days seems to somehow equate to success — don’t be afraid to disappear from it, from us, for a while and see what comes to you in the silence.”

Every part of you is beautiful. You actually are beautiful when you know all the answers and Still tenderly beautiful when you are when you don’t have an idea what’s going on.

I wrote about what I did when that emotion came knocking on heart door in Aug- Dec 2022-June 2023.

Read it here: When I was growing wings

With Love,

Rania I.